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Ketch-up

I was going to try and remember everything that happened since surgery and have an entry for each day but it sounds like too much hard work and would make for dreary reading. Here are some highlights.

As I healed I had less need of the various tubes inside my body. The nurse or Dr. will prep you for removal until you are at the point where they just have to yank it out. “OK deep breath…” and the 20′ foot long tube down my nose is coming up my oesophagus, up my throat, turning in my nose and “Holy shit look at that bastard! I can’t believe you stuck that in me!.” It hangs limp and slick. Die gut sucking snake – die!

Then there was the catheter in my penis. I don’t know if it was better or worse to have the most beautiful nurse in the hospital perform this task, but I was distracted, at least, by Kasi’s beauty. She surely is a Nigerian Princess of stunning good looks and a placid demeanour.

I have no idea how they deflate the little poodle balloon but it is done and then “OK deep breath…” and there is a little resistance, rubber on dry urethra… but if you really pull, OMG, it comes out and there, all over. Smile for Kasi.

drainsThe drains on my neck were attached with sutures. Imagine hanging a couple of goose eggs from your neck using fish-hooks to attach them to your skin. They are firmly held but it hurts and they swing about and get in the way and you get paranoid that you will do something and tear them out. So you move about as if doing some lame, slow motion Tai Chi. I brush the horses tail.

I had the drains removed yesterday. Dr. Myers’ P.A. removed them. Snip snip snip snip on the sutures and “OK deep breath…” and down they slide out of my neck and “Jesus Christ look at those fucking things! Damn.”

This morning I finally took off all the little bits of dressing, misc. pieces of surgical tape and other detritus of the operation and had a shower. Oh that felt good. And I had a pretty good tooth cleaning although I am leary about brushing way back in my mouth. Some clean clothes and I felt half decent.

Only thing – I look at my face and my non surgical side is all plump and my chin flesh is fat and hanging down and my surgical side is lean and cut back and am I going to look like this from now on? Turns out it’s probably more drainage so get to go in again this afternoon to have it looked at.

So I’m sitting here writing this. I feel stupid and cocky in some respects for being cavalier about the whole affair pre-surgery. Who knew I would have a 6″ incision on my throat? Who knew that there was more tissue and lymph nodes affected? I had no idea that I could feel so much pain one minute and then within half an hour be reasonably ok, thanks to my friend Morphine.

On reflection however, by being dumb and just wanting to get on with it I didn’t have a pre-surgery wait where I was anxious and full of fear. God knows I have times now when I am more anxious than ever. But what really helped is the streams of good wishes, love, prayer and healing that my friends all over the World sent me. Thank God for the Robot but you gotta love the Love.

2 comments to Ketch-up

  • Fankler

    I think you have been outstanding. I would be much slower in recovery without you. XL

  • Mrs. Hall

    I wish there was a “like” button for your posts. 🙂 You have been very brave and very calm. I wish your wife could say the same!

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